Expert Panel – How do you nicely tell someone you aren’t interested?

Oct 11, 2021

Liv Talley, Dating Coach

“The act of communicating your disinterest IS THE KINDNESS. What you say doesn’t matter as much as the integrity of just letting someone know they aren’t for you! Everyone deserves to find someone that is excited / invested in spending time together. “

Tammy Hill, Marriage and Family Therapist, and BYU Professor

“1– true, positive statement 2– message 3– express appreciation Example: “I think you are so _____ (smart, funny, pretty), and I am honored that you want to date me. Right now I am not ready for this relationship. Thank you for respecting my decision not to date you. I appreciate the time we’ve spent together and what I’ve learned from you.'”

Jerry & Briahnna Scott, from Single to Sealed Podcast

“Okay, first of all TELL them you are not interested. Communication is key, even in the end of a dating relationship. The worst thing you can do to someone is ghost them and leave them with no answers and no closure whatsoever. The truth is, sometimes there isn’t a way to tell someone you aren’t interested without hurt feelings. Rejection gets to the best of us. It is difficult on both ends of rejection. Be kind when telling someone you aren’t interested in pursuing a relationship with them, but be honest. The best way to let someone down is with the truth. Tell them what lead you to your decision and do your best to use effective “I” statements. Thank them for the opportunity to get to know them and connect with them, and give them a clean break. Do not continue to text, call, or reach out to someone after saying goodbye. It makes their healing process a lot harder.”

Mutual Expert Panel
Mutual | + posts

The Mutual Expert Panel is made up of counselors, therapists, dating coaches, and others with a professional understanding of dating, love, and relationships.

Liv Talley
LDS Dating Coach & Expert at The Sealed Deal | + posts

Liv Talley is an LDS dating and relationship coach, lifestyle mentor, and published author of the book: Sorry, You’re Not Perfect. She has helped singles find love, get married in the temple, and build exceptionally blessed lives through in-depth mindset coaching and personal acceptance/self-compassion.


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