I Was Banned and I Don’t Know Why

Jun 8, 2023

Alright, so you were banned. Let’s talk about it. To keep Mutual a safe and worry-free dating environment for all of our members, we’ve established some Community Guidelines.

We know having extra rules can seem kind of lame. We get it; you’re grown adults and want to make your own choices. We promise that following our Community Guidelines makes things better – just like in the gospel, how commandments restrict us but also give us the freedom to act with agency, right? By eliminating content that might offend or endanger someone in our community, we help you swipe with confidence on Mutual.

If you’ve been banned, either your profile or your interactions with others (in-person or online) goes against the Community Guidelines. Here’s a breakdown of some of the main points of the guidelines:

Be A Single Adult

This should be self-explanatory. If you’re not single, or you’re not an adult, you can’t use Mutual. If you’re still in a marriage relationship (separated but not divorced still counts as “in a relationship”) or not 18 yet, Mutual isn’t for you. Hang in there! You can join Mutual when you are officially a single adult.

Be Respectful

Nobody wants to be harassed or made fun of. If you wouldn’t say it out loud, in person, to their face, or if it’s something your mom would be embarrassed to find out about, please just keep it to yourself. 

We have zero tolerance for sexual harassment, racism, and hate speech. These things are never okay and will get you removed from Mutual. When in doubt, think, “if there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report, or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.” (Articles of Faith 1:13)

Act Appropriately

Another scripture to have handy when making any life choice, but especially while dating, is Jacob 6:12; “O be wise, what can I say more?”

Just because you’re behind a screen doesn’t mean it’s a free-for-all, and just because you’re appropriate in-app doesn’t mean you’re in the clear to act differently in person. 

We expect members of the Mutual community to act appropriately both online and in person. Sexual harassment of ANY kind, including sending or requesting nude photos on any platform, will get you banned.

Upload Good Photos

You’re not going to get banned for having a low-quality selfie on your profile, but you WILL get banned if you repeatedly disregard community guidelines about what kind of photos you can have on your profile. 

Here are some examples of what NOT to post on your profile:

  • Shirtless or swimsuit photos out of appropriate settings. (This applies to both men and women.) Swimming? Totally fine. Shirtless, swimsuit, or sports bra gym selfies? Big nope.
  • Excessively exposing photos. “As you make decisions about your clothing, hairstyle, and appearance, ask yourself, ‘Am I honoring my body as a sacred gift from God?’ Heavenly Father wants us to see each other for who we really are: not just physical bodies but His beloved children with a divine destiny. Avoid styles that emphasize or draw inappropriate attention to your physical body instead of who you are as a child of God with an eternal future.” – For The Strength of Youth
  • Anything showing drugs or alcohol. Do we really need to explain why this is a rule?

Excessively gory or bloody photos. We’re totally fine with you showing off your hunting trophies, but if that trophy photo shows a lot of blood and guts, it’s gonna be a no from us.

What Happens When A Profile Is Reported?

Sometimes a profile will be banned because of something our support team finds. Other times it’s because another member of the Mutual community sent us a report. We respect everyone’s privacy and want to protect the people who report inappropriate behavior, so we won’t be able to share who reported your profile or other specifics that might reveal their identity. If you’ve been banned, look over the Community Guidelines and see if something in your profile or your personal conduct may go against those guidelines.

Please know that we take great care when considering banning someone. We take reports very seriously and thoroughly review each of them. Where possible, we’ll reach out to you and ask you to change your profile, or we’ll temporarily suspend your profile before banning you.

We may have to ban you without warning, depending on how severe the offense is. Examples include reports of sexual assault, rape, battery, or kidnapping. These kinds of reports are severe, and we treat them as such. According to our partner, UCASA (Utah Coalition Against Sexual Assault), studies show that 98% of reports are genuine, so our policy is to assume that reports are true.

“We are happy to sacrifice revenue for the safety of our community any day.” – Bob Carroll, Co-Founder and CEO of Mutual

What If I Don’t Think I Should Have Been Banned?

People tend to worry and ask, “What if someone was reported and banned wrongly?” No need to stress. We recognize that even with our thorough investigation of each report, there’s always a chance that we’ve received false information or only half of the story. If you feel like you’ve been wrongfully banned, you can appeal the ban here.

Before submitting your appeal, it’s a good idea to review our Safety Center on our blog and the Community Guidelines to educate yourself on what’s appropriate and what’s not. If, after reviewing everything, you decide to appeal your ban, we recommend sharing as much info with us as you feel comfortable with so that we can get the whole picture and make a fair decision.

Like reports, we review every appeal individually and carefully. It is important to point out that submitting an appeal does not guarantee that you’ll be let back into the app. 

If you are allowed back on Mutual, keep in mind that it will be on a probationary basis. If we receive any additional reports about you, you’ll be banned for good.

If you appeal your ban and you’re still not let back onto Mutual, all is not lost! We encourage you to look for ways to continue your personal education and progression. We’re not saying you can’t date, and we’re not saying you won’t someday find an eternal companion… just that Mutual is not the right place to search for them.

Mutual Team
Mutual | Website | + posts

Our team of love experts at Mutual works hard to make sure you have the most helpful dating advice out there. Whether you're still searching for your person or working to move your relationship from the chat bubble to in-person, we've got your back every step of the way.


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